Why do people prefer to talk to total strangers online than the people physically around them?
Author: Yeniden
A million things to say, a sleepy mind, a broken back and suddenly I found myself at home, doing nothing else but thinking of my life, my choices, the people I consider my own, my friends, family, ex boyfriends… people who have touched my life in a good or bad way.
I always had the need to write; good or bad, it doesn’t matter. I just have the need to put my thoughts and emotions on paper –or something like that. For years I was writing down everything, but never showed anyone anything. I really hate to be criticized, not for the quality of my writing, but the quality of my thoughts and emotions.
For the past two years that I have been talking to people around the earth, I realized that writing is my thing, what makes me feel good, what eases my feelings toward the world. After going through a minor sickness, I thought of my priorities and my dreams; what I need and what it is that I want. Writing was on top of my list. I never tried to show anyone what my efforts on that were, probably because I know the people around me better than they think.
Nine months ago, I met someone online, with whom I developed a strange relation. Nothing romantic or any of that kind. I consider him to be my brother, as he thinks of me as his sister. With his encouragement I started this blog, one step closer to what I wanted. He liked the way I was writing to him through my emails, he could get the feeling I wanted him to get. Simple as that. One day, he popped the idea of putting my thoughts out publicly, he even insisted when I refused ’til finally he convinced me. Since then, I even tried my luck with articles and it’s a slow process as I am a beginner, but it goes surprisingly better than I thought.
While I was waiting for my first article to be published or not-which it did- I decided it was time to tell my best friends about it. I didn’t expect much from them, let’s face it if I did expect a warm reaction I would have told them sooner, but what I got was by far the most lousy thing to do to someone you claim you care about. Absolutely no support, no feeling about it. Rather, I was asked why do I try to do stuff like that? Why do I have the need to try and be something else from what I am. I have to note here, that this was the reaction of one of them and that she has never read anything I wrote, even though I gave her one piece. The rest of my friends were a bit warmer, but still haven’t read a single thing, or even if they have they never told me what they thought. I do know though, that what I gave them to read has been published. So it must have been a bit good, at least up to a level.
When the people around you doom you with their reactions, or with the lack of interest about your needs or tries, why wouldn’t you talk to total strangers about the things that bother you?
When you meet no support from your real life friends, why wouldn’t you turn to people you have never met, yet they are nicer and more thoughtful? I am not saying that these types of relations always last or that if you were actually neighbors things would be the same, but even if the person behind the emails is not who you really think, don’t you get something in return –the strength to follow your dreams, the hope that there are people caring about you?
Anyone can give you advice on something, but the ones who know you the best are supposed to help you grab on so that you don’t fall. Unfortunately, today most people try to be the ones who will throw you over the cliff. When did our life get so meaningless that one’s doom is the reason to be happy?
Not everyone has huge dreams about their lives, but is it really a protective reaction not to let your friends fly to the sky? No risk, no gain. No gain, no pain. Life is too short to spend it fearing your own shadow. But you need people to hold you both when you fly and when you crash. I treasure the most the ones who hold my hand dearly when I dream. And the people who have done that are people I met on line. Maybe I will never actually meet them, maybe after a year things won’t be the same between us, but they are the ones really listening and really allowing me to lean on them when I need it the most.
