Let Go of the Past to Grow into Your Tomorrow
Author: Britt Santowski
Hanging on to the past can actually serve as an anchor: it keeps you cemented in “what was” and disables your ability to see “what can be.”
In an earlier post, I referenced the fact that memories are in the mind only: every cell in your body has changed, and the cellular being of when you were a child no longer exists! Only the memory does. This doesn’t make it any less real. It did happen, whatever trauma you’re dwelling on. But your body has let it go; perhaps it’s time that your mind followed suit!
In order to achieve success as an entrepreneur(an anything else for that matter), we all must learn how to let go of past failures and disappointments and not carry them with us into our future. This is not an option. It’s a requirement.
Hanging on to pain, bitterness and disappointment from a past conflict is a heavy burden. It affects your moods, attitudes, relationships, job and all aspects of your life. Negativity eats away at your self-esteem and destroys any possibility of a life free from pain.
Here’s the good news: Your future doesn’t have to be a repetition of your past. You can, in THIS moment, choose a different path. You don’t need to be destined to a life of pain, arched around the memories of you miserable past, regardless of what you’ve already been through. (And if you think you’ve suffered, I strongly recommend you read Man’s Search for Ultimate Meaning
You can lay down your burdens. It’s okay for you to be free. In fact, you deserve it!
These five steps will help you move forward and find the freedom you need to begin living a fuller, more enjoyable life, regardless of what lies in your past:
1. Talk about it. Discuss your past pain, fear, disappointment or trauma with a trusted friend or family member. Fully express the feelings associated with the situation: cry, scream, or do whatever you need to do to release the bottled up emotions in a safe way. But talk about it with the ENTIRE intention to release it, NOT to relive it.
- Until you really talk about the feelings connected to your past, you may not be able to move past them. Once you’ve spoken the words, release them from your mind forever. As hard as it may be, it’s the only way to free yourself from your past.
2. Use a journal. Writing in a journal is an excellent way to pour out your pain. A journal offers the safety of knowing your words are just for you and won’t be read by anyone else. Don’t worry about spelling, grammar, or even if the words follow a logical progression, simply write from the heart.
- Physically writing your thoughts and feelings can release your emotions so you can move past them. Again, write with the intent to release, not relive. Personally, I find that burning the document is a great way to set it free.
3. Seek forgiveness. Many people misunderstand the meaning of forgiveness. Forgiveness doesn’t mean what happened to you is unimportant or you’re saying it’s “okay.” In fact, forgiveness isn’t about the other person at all.
Forgiveness simply means that you’ve made the choice to let go of the desire to exact revenge and punishment, and you’ve found closure within your heart and soul.
- Forgiveness releases you from the burden of carrying the pain any longer. By choosing to forgive, you can stop thinking about the past so it won’t control your future.
4. Seek professional guidance. You can choose to get help from a life coach or therapist.
The people closest to us aren’t always the best choice to help us work through our pain. It may be difficult for us to fully open up about our deepest pain or it may be hard for them to step back far enough to help us through it.
- Seeking guidance from a professional gives us the safety of relative anonymity, which can make it easier to share our problems. Often a coach or counselor can help us see a new point of view, which can help us move forward. And take good care choosing a counselor. In my training, we were taught to “go into the hole with the client and be there, hear their pain.” This is NOT the kind of counselor you want! You want someone who challenges your OLD view, who challenges the story that you know so well you can tell it in your sleep.
5. Use alternative therapies. There are many techniques you can use to help change your mindset, which can be instrumental in leaving the past behind.
One method, known as EFT or Emotional Freedom Technique, uses the principles of acupuncture (without the needles!) to help you take the “charge” out of your feelings. EFT is done by tapping with your fingertips on the meridian points in the upper part of your body.
- The tapping sequence, combined with verbally expressing your feelings, helps break up the blockage of energy caused by the negative feelings, allowing you to release them. Wikipedia has a good introduction to it here.
Hanging onto past negativity isn’t necessary. No matter what your history contains, you can learn to release it and move forward into a life filled with contentment and joy. Find a method that works for you and begin, today, to let go of the past and move into the life you deserve!
To your eternal success!
Britt Santowski
Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/entrepreneurship-articles/let-go-of-the-past-to-grow-into-your-tomorrow-1051037.html
About the Author
Britt Santowski is the author of chickrag (www.chickrag.com), the blog for women entrepreneurs, and founder of I’m Allowed (www.imallowed.com), for all entrepreneurs
