Author: John Cane

Having habits is kind of like having an ‘autopilot’.  When we practice our habits we strengthen neural connections.  If we do it enough, chores, exercise, eating, work, etc. seem to happen automatically. With a little early discipline, you can create a new habit that is easy to maintain.

Tips For Making New Habits Last:

• Commit to Three to Four Weeks – This is all the time you need to make a habit automatic. After the initial conditioning phase, it becomes easier to sustain. Fit it into your calendar.
• Do it Daily – Stay consistent to make it stick. If you want to get in shape, go to the gym every day. If you only go a couple times a week, it’s harder for the habit to stick. Activities you do once every few days are trickier to lock in as habits.
• Keep it Simple – Don’t try to change your life over night. We sometimes get over motivated and take on too much. If you want to read for two hours a day, try just doing it for thirty minutes and then build on that.
• Have Reminders Around – A couple of weeks in, you may forget. Keep reminders nearby to carry out your habit each day. Missing time defeats the purpose of setting a habit.
• Be Consistent – The more regular your habit the easier it will stick. Let’s say you are exercising, do it at the same time and same place. Reminders like time of day, place and circumstances will allow the habit to stick when they are the same.
• Have Support – Find someone who will support you and go along to keep you motivated if you feel like quitting.
• Form a Talisman – A talisman in this sense is a trigger or ritual you use right before accomplishing your habit. Let’s say you wanted to wake up earlier.  You could wake up at exactly the same time every morning.  If you wanted to stop smoking you might hold your hands together before you felt like picking up a cigarette.
• Maintain Needs – If you feel you are giving something up in your habit, make sure you replace any needs you’ve lost. If smoking was your way to relax, you can take up meditation or reading to replace that same need.
• Don’t Try to Be Perfect – Don’t expect your habits to be successful immediately. When I started trying to make my bed just after I got up every morning, I skipped a couple times.  Now it’s second nature.  Try your best; however expect a few bumps along the way.
• “But” – This is a great technique used by a top therapist for changing bad thought patterns. When you start to have negative thoughts, use the word “but” to stop it.  For example, “I’m not good at doing this, but if I work at it I can get better.”
• Take Away Temptation – Reorganize your surroundings so there is nothing to tempt you within your 3-4 weeks. Remove foods from your house, cancel your mega-TV show subscription, and throw out cigarettes, liquor, etc. so you won’t need to struggle with willpower later on.
• Hang Around Role Models – Spend more time with people who inspire you to follow through and help you strengthen your new habit—the habits you want to mirror. A study found that if you have an overweight friend(s) you are more likely to become fat. Think about it.
• Look at it as an Experiment – Hold back judgment until after a month has past.  Think of it as an experiment in behavior. Have fun with it.  It’s just a test-trial. Research doesn’t fail it just produces different results.  This can give you a different perspective on changing your habit.
• Be Aware of the Downside – Be aware of the consequences. Enlighten yourself to information about the downsides of not making a change.  This can give you extra motivation.
• Write it Down – Writing makes your ideas more clear.  This allows you to focus on your end result.  Journaling has been supported for decades based on the simple understanding that when we write something down, in a sense we make it more real.
• Be an Actor – Play ‘make believe’.  Be a little kid again. Play and find humor and passion in acting the way you know you can be.  The imagination is endless in its potential.  Believe what you make.
• Understand the Benefits – Know the benefits of making a change. Get books which show benefits of regular exercise, notice changes in energy after you take on a new diet, or imagine improving your grades because your study habits have gotten better.
• Swish – This is a technique from Neuro-Linguistic Programming. Create in your mind you performing the habit you want to rid yourself of, and then picture yourself pushing the bad habit away and choosing another (good) option. At the end of that progression see yourself in a highly positive state. See yourself picking up the cigarette, see yourself putting it down and folding your hands.  Then if you’d like, you can see yourself running and breathing. Do it a few times.  This will help you to get to the point where you can automatically go through the pattern before carrying out the old habit.
• Be an Example – Be that person that shows others that anything is possible.  Be an inspiration to help others to change for the better.
• Do it For You – Don’t worry about the habits some people think you “should” have. Instead shape your habits to fit your goals and the things that motivate you. We need resolutions that are emotionally driven.  Resolutions that has personal meaning in them.  “Guilt” in the end is not a good motivator.

About the Author

John Cane develops and implements confidence and self-esteem workshops in North Carolina, South Carolina, and New York. With a background in Psychology, John has six separate certifications in Personal Growth and Development.